What happened after becoming a born again
My Accomplishments, Setbacks, Total Depression, & Recovery
Since becoming a child of God, I have tried to serve Him. God called me
into the ministry in Feb. 1981 and I was licensed through the Allegre
Missionary Baptist Church. I then began doing missionary work. (You can
read and see some pictures about the trips and work on my Missionary
page). I have made 1 gospel album,
"Riding for Jesus" and 1 gospel singing tape (with some of the songs I
"My Songs of Praise". I have written gospel songs and poem. Have received
numerous certificates of appreciation and won the Editor's Choice Award,
presented to me by the National Library of Poetry. I have a poem and
biography published in a book entitled "Dance Upon the Shore". I have
preached and sung on radio, TV, for revivals, homecomings, crusades, etc.
The Holy Spirit has revealed many deep truths to me but my walk hasn't
always been a bed of roses. I have slipped on occasion and just as the
prodigal son, had wallowed with the swine: Luke 15; 11, 32
I am not bragging and I hope that you don't take it that way. I have not
accomplished a great deal as in comparison with the many great men down
through the ages and what little I have done was and is by the Grace of
God. And so to God Must I give all credit, Praise and Glory. I am just so
thankful that God has allowed me to be His humble servant.
Some people would have you believe that becoming a Christian and living
the Christian life is a bowl of cherries, apiece of cake, as simple as
falling off of a log. But nothing could be further from the truth. While
this may not be the way it happened in your case, it is what happened to
me. I fought being saved for over two years before finally surrendering my
life to Jesus and accepting Him as my Lord and Saviour. After becoming a
child of the King I thought my problems were over and nothing major
happened for several years. BUT THEN, Satan sneaked in the back door. I
was trying to fight him with sin in my life and that is like climbing into
a boxing ring with both boxing gloves tied behind your back and your shoe
laces tied together. Even Muhammad Ali couldn't win a fight like that.
I didn't have on the whole armor of God and my work for the Lord slowed to
almost a stop. Singing very little and preaching even less I became
complacent; Being content with doing the minimal service. Not willing to
do ALL that God wanted me to do and God allowed me to get away with it for
a season. I will say this however; when God has had enough it becomes a
When you have been walking on the water with Jesus but then look away and
all of a sudden find yourself sinking into the dark waters; no longer able
to breath, barely able to see because the water is almost over your head,
Well, it doesn't take a Rocket Scientist
to figure out that you need both hands reaching and groping for the Hem of
His Robe. Right now you are probably asking yourself; How could anyone let
himself get into this kind of predicament? The Answer!
Just a little bit at a time until all at once you realize and wake up to
the fact of where you are and what you have done.
In 1995 I became disabled and went from being very active, working as a
construction boilermaker welder, raising Appaloosa Horses, doing
missionary, evangelistic, and singing engagements, plus I had a welding
and paint shop where I restored old cars, etc. to being totally inactive.
Since that time I have gone from being overweight to (what the doctor
terms) morbid obesity (in excess of 450 Lbs. and life threatening).
This on top of other physical problems caused me to go into deep
depression, so much so as thoughts of suicide became my constant
companion. And yes, I had the hammer cocked on my 357 and was chewing on
the barrel more than once. Not even Connie, my wife, knew about this as I
have kept it to myself, withdrawn from everyone. My mind became a total
disaster. All I can say is, that Jesus was always with me and kept me from
pulling the trigger, even though I didn't realize it at the time.
I am ashamed of these times in my Christian life and wasn't going to
include this in my testimony. But the Holy Spirit has revealed to me that
some other sad, lonely, and distraught person may need to see this and
realize that if I could overcome this problem by the Grace of God, then
they could too. If you are reading this and you are or have been thinking
of just ending it all, PLEASE! PLEASE! TALK TO JESUS!
No matter how far you have fallen. No matter what kind of trouble you are
in. No matter what you have done. No matter who has deeply hurt you. No
matter who you have lost. No matter what kind of physical shape you have
NO MATTER! NO MATTER! IT WILL GET BETTER!
I promise you it will get better. I PROMISE!
I am not a psychiatrist. I am not a counselor. I am just an ol' roughneck
who, by the Grace of God found Jesus one day and accepted Him as My Lord
and Saviour. I have learned in life that people will let you down,
parents, husbands, wives, children, friends, and family will all let you
down. Every one and every thing will let you down BUT Jesus will never let
you down. He will ALWAYS be there for you.
In Feb. 1999, Connie got me a computer and I started playing checkers,
spades, euchre, etc. I had been in depression for 3+ years at this time
and every day had become a battle, both mentally as well as physically. As
I started learning how to use my computer, I one day stumbled across a
Christian site Home Page. It was beautiful and I started hunting for more
Christian sites, I was starving for Jesus and I couldn't get enough and I
might add I still can't. One day as I was surfing the Holy Spirit said;
You could do this. You can make one of these sites. It was like a bolt of
lightning had hit me. Well I am here to tell you that my first attempt was
a total disaster so I decided to make my Appaloosa Horse site first. I
figured if I made a mess of that no one would care. I kept learning,
mostly by trial and error and would lock my computer up so bad that I
would have to run the start up disk to set it back to factory specs. I
would lose everything. Finally I had a horse site with music and felt
comfortable with trying to make something worthy enough to please God.
And so the last of September 1999 I began the "I'm Heaven Bound" site.
Since 1995 I had thought my ministry was over but now I realize that God
had something else in mind for me. I just had to suffer some trials and
tribulations in preparation of transforming my mind to doing His Will. I
will not lie to you. It hasn't been easy and I am in almost constant pain
and I spend many long hours to get a page just the way I feel that God
would be pleased with. I can see by the comments in my guest book and by
the e-mails I have been receiving and the votes I have gotten for my
Christian site that I am accomplishing what God has set forth for me to
do. And that is to be a blessing and to encourage others, and to reach a
lost and dying world with Jesus.
I can now rejoice in my infirmities, (1Peter 4: 12, 13), realizing that
God allowed my disability so that I might be able to understand some of
the complexities of the fragile mind, and through this understanding, show
compassion and love for those who are experiencing the emotional trauma of
depression. If you are sad, lonely, or depressed, Talk to Jesus, start
reading your Bible, and ask the Holy Spirit to help you see the light at
the end of the tunnel. The main thing is; 11Cor. 12: 9, 10 DON'T EVER GIVE UP!
HERE IS A TIP. If you want to feel better about your self, start by
helping someone who is less fortunate than you, and can not possibly pay
you for your deed of kindness. Would you like to know a secret? Praise
God, I no longer have time to be depressed since I have focused all of my
energy in trying to help others through this on line ministry. God is so
Good and all I can say is, Thank you, Sweet Jesus!
Are you searching for something and have tried everything but nothing has
seemed to work. You are at the end of your rope and don't know where to
turn. Then why not give your life to Jesus? These next few minutes could
possibly be the most important time in your life and the decision you will
now make, I guarantee, will be the most important decision you have or
ever will make. Will I reject Jesus Christ or will I accept Him? The
decision is yours and yours alone. No one can make it for you. IF YOU HAVE
DECIDED TO ACCEPT JESUS, THEN WHY NOT PRAY TO HIM NOW!
Dear God, I know that I am a sinner and I am
sorry for my sins and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe in your Son,
Jesus, that He was born of a virgin, suffered and died for my sins, but
arose from the grave and is alive and with you in Heaven right now. I
accept you, Jesus, as my Lord and Saviour and ask that you save my soul.
Seal me with the Holy Spirit. For I pray this in the Name of Jesus Christ,
But if you’re not sure you are ready for this most important decision
concerning your eternal welfare and, If you would like to FIRST know more about
Jesus then I’d ask that you go here and read the page: ”Let me Introduce
You to Jesus” Make sure to Turn up your speakers. This model prayer is on
that page for you also.
But the very most important thing when dealing with God is truthful, from
the heart, sincerity. After all you’re talking to the One who created the
universe and all that there in is. He is the only One who deserves our
total awe, respect, and worship; for He is the Great I AM…
And please: Don’t be one of these mealy mouthed hypocrites pretending to
be something they just aren’t. For those who are; will one day stand
before God and hear Him say. Depart from me ye who work iniquity
But and if you have prayed in your own words this prayer to Jesus, and
earnestly meant it:
Then you are now a child of God and will spend eternity in Heaven. Now, go
and tell someone about your decision and begin reading your Bible. I
usually recommend you start with the book of John.
And if you are physically able, find and attend a church that is preaching
the word of God and where you feel comfortable and get baptized into that
local body of believers. God Bless you as you begin
your new walk with Jesus.
July 28, 2002 my doctor told me to get my affairs in order, find 6 strong
men, and call the family in… That was pretty plain, wasn’t it? But glory
to God, the Great physician, He wasn’t ready for this ole preacher to go
home just yet. And so the following March 2003, after having months of the
family and friends here every weekend, I went out and bought a brand new
Suzuki Volusia 800cc motor cycle and have been riding it ever since. To
date, I have over 6200 miles logged. And most have been around the 9 mile
block I ride around here in the country.
My son Scott and sister-in-law Dianne on his Harley and yours truly on
2009 Update Note: Since I wrote
the original testimony back in ‘99’ and got the Suzuki there has been
many things happen. Some good but some have been very hard to handle.
For we lost our
19 year old grandson, Scotty in 2006 in a auto accident. In Jan. of 2007 my son Jimmy and I went to Mich. and picked up an old
1949 Chrysler. The story is on the hobbies and work section of this site
under the welding hood… (smile) I still go to the garage on good days and
piddle with my old cars and bike… Mind you I may be out there sitting in
the garage 5 hours and be able to do only 5 or 10 minutes of work but the
main thing is simply this. I refuse to give up! The rest of the time I’m
sitting here in my wheel chair and on this computer, trying to do
something which will be pleasing to my Heavenly Father. Oh and by the way.
Since 1999 I’ve worn out, blown up, or used up, 6 computers and this one
is beginning to get weary.
Latest news update
Aug 22, 2009: My friend Steve got my computer going but said it was worn
out... My dear pastor friend from Pennsylvania, Rev. Harold Kelley, was
visiting that very weekend and when he heard about the computer problem,
he wrote out a check to get a new one. So Connie girl went and picked
the old one up from Steve and then went to the store and got this one
I'm now using... Amazing how God worked all of that out and in His
timing. Well Glory!
Sorry, I got a little side
tracked. Well, after Scotty died in the fall of 2006 it was in the
spring of 2007, my Connie girl had a heart attack and they had to put in
4 splints. She is doing really well now and is doing something for
someone all the time. Always on the road and helping someone. So
what I can't do physically she handles and I do the online ministry. I
have over 2000 folks in my email part of this ministry now so together
my Connie girl and I make a pretty good team.
And then in 2008,
our son Jimmy was killed in an auto accident and both grandchildren were
hurt pretty bad. But, as a result of the accident, that very Sunday,
Aaron, Scotty's younger brother and our grandson found Jesus as his
personal Saviour. Yes praise God, there is another child of God, saved
and born again. God took a tragedy and used it to reach a young man and
save his soul... Well glory!
this last spring, April 6, 2009, my mom passed away and went to be with
Jesus. So the past several years have been a roller coaster ride of ups
and downs, good and bad. But I simply can't quit. I can't give up!
I must keep going for my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ! I just simply
must keep on keeping on!
The main thing here is that God has a work for me,
my Connie girl, and for you as well to complete... But as for me? Well,
is finished with me I’ll be, by the grace of God, right here doing the
very best I can to spread the Good News around the world. The time is
short and I know that this world, as you and I know it, is soon going to
be gone. For my Jesus is coming back to gather all of His children and
take them home with Him… The tribulation period of time is in the 11th
hour… My Question is:
ARE YOU READY???
Thank you for coming and reading this, my testimony pt.2
May God bless you in His love,
The Music on this site is copyrighted by the respective artist and is
placed here for entertainment and educational purposes only.
No Profits are made on this site from their use.
Please support these artist by purchasing their music.
Song was placed on my site with permission; Here's the letter:
It is wonderful to hear that He's Alive has blessed you. Please do feel
free to use the song on your site, and I do appreciate the link back to
our site as well. Thank you.
Blessings in your ministry!