Uncle Danny's New Motor Home!


This story comes in the form of a e-mail which I received from my uncle Danny and my reply back to him!!!! I've put their picture at the bottom. This is the actual letter which I received from my Uncle...

" Special Announcement"
To all my friends and Neighbors of Daniel and Tink Curtis..

Dear Friends and Neighbors of Ours. We are very thankful for all of the meals that we have eaten at your houses over the last few years. It has come to my attention by my book keeper, that it is costing us more to eat than it would if we stay home. (Tink) my book keeper says, however this is not to put down our friends, it's the cost of gasoline. We usually eat at someone's house at least 6 times a week which is the only way we can make it, being that we are both retired.

Starting immediately we will be eating at least three (3) meals at your house when we come to visit you. We figger 2 meals would be a break even endulgement, so to make it a winning thing to do we have decided to do it way.

Now before you get ruffled up about having to feed us 3 times a day, remember, IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT !! it's the gas company's fault, and both you and us have to pay for it, so if you have any problem with this proposal write your congressman and your gas company for relief.

Again, we are so grateful for all the good meals that yo have slaved over and made for us. By the way, we like our steak med. rare, and we really like baked potatoes not french fries. So starting Monday, March 27, when you see us pull up at the front door, look for us for the WHOLE DAY.

PS. " bright side" when gas prices drop we'll go back to once a day for each meal stop.... Thank you for your patience. Dan & Tink

ps. Jim, I will be there tomorrow for you to help me work on my home page.

Here Is my REPLY to Uncle Danny's letter!!!

Dear Danny and Tink, After reading your letter I have come to realize that the gas prices have affected us all and I am in agreement with you. Make sure when you come tomorrow that you bring some information concerning what you want to put on the Curtis web site and the pictures you want on there and we will get your page under way. I will need to know the theme of the page , etc.

For the meal menu tomorrow and due to also being retired and the gas Connie has burned, saving money going to yard sales, this last week, and the cost there of, we are going to eat as follows.

 Green toast made from 2 week old bread. It wasn't green to start with but turned that way with age. I have heard that it is better for your digestive track that way. Hot black coffee. It is a special blend as I keep adding 1 spoon of grounds until the hopper is full. This usually takes about two weeks to accomplish but the last couple of days the coffee meets you half way. Yummy! You will have to stop by Shonies and grab a couple of creamers if you want your coffee to be white because I shot the cow so we can have the rare steak you love so much. It is OK cause the cow was giving lumpy milk anyway.

1 hard boiled egg (note) you may want to check it cause the chickens have been hiding and sometimes we don't find the eggs for 2 or 3 weeks and they are in the final developing stages. But HEY, It is always good to have a little bit of meat with your meal, right? Some brown beans to help you with your GAS problem Another piece of green toast. I'll be glad when that loaf is gone!! A tall glass of weak tea as we only have 1 tea bag.

 Is your mouth watering yet. Your very favorite dish.... Very Rare Steak (garanteed) cause we will have used all the cooking gas to boil the beans you ate for dinner. Make sure to bring a hand saw to cut some wood and we will have a fire in the back yard. That way we can hold the steak over it to scenge the hair off the old milk cow. I hung her in a tree about 2 weeks ago in anticipation of your coming and I figured the skin would fall off by now because she was old, but she was tougher than I had expected.

Some refried beans ( but only if you bring some matches for the back yard fire.) If you should forget the matches, that will be OK cause I heard that cold beans produce more gas and extremely rare meat will make you wide eyed.

A big tall glass of blue green water (As a gourmet, I thought you might like this special water as it comes from my horse pond. It has a little horsey flavor but the fish smell usually covers it up.) I will get a bucket full of this water, first thing in the morning so it will be fresh. I hope that I don't forget to put a rag over the bucket cause the flies always want to get in there and when I make ice cubes from it you can't spot them until it is too late...

And for desert, A great big piece of chocolate cake. (We may have to nuke it for 35 seconds) That way the green hair growing on top will melt back into the iceing. If you like, we can melt some of the lumps from the leftover cow's milk, add a yellow crayon for color, and spread this on top of the iceing of the cake for added flavor.

I know that you will like this menu and I am really looking forward to our visit with you tomorrow. If you bring an extra pair of drawers you could spend the night and we could eat the leftovers the next day. Wouldn't that be fun? As you can plainly see the gas prices haven't effected us that much but don't forget the creamer and the matches. We are excited about your coming. Have a great day and May God Bless, Jim

PS. I have cut a piece of old garden hose that should be long enough to reach from the front seat of your car to the carburetor. I have heard that bean gas is very cost effective and improves your fuel mileage by 65%

PPS. Your old car doesn't backfire does it? That could effect your driving skills somewhat. You know, fire running back up the garden hose and all. Drive carefully and we will see you tomorrow...........

PPPS. This menu is subject to change, but only if the neighbor's dogs find the cow hanging in the tree. IF they do we might be having hot dogs for supper!!!!

OH, Look Honey; Here comes Danny and Tink now!

  =    =
         Got cha, Danny and Tinky, didn't I? Hee hee! 






The Christian Counter


To visit Danny and Tinky's Christmas site

Click Here

This page created by;

Copyright 2000/2009 JimKeelingMinistries
Webmaster: All Rights Reserved